Susan the Princess

Once upon a time there lived the most beautiful princess in all the land called Susan who was banished to the top of the tallest tower of the tallest castle on the top of the tallest peak of the tallest mountain which was in the farthest corner of the most distant land, all in all she was very high up and very far away. Now the princess’s mother who was called Janet used to be the most beautiful woman in the land but had actually died when her daughter Susan was a baby. So the King who was called Graham and was the wisest and bravest man in all the land had married another woman called Shirley who was a vain, cruel, devious and deceitfully wicked witch.
Sally loved to pick huge amounts of flowers and give them to George to show him how much she loved picking flowers and George would put them in the compost to show Sally how much he loved composting. Now Sally and George who were simple villagers had just been married about seven years ago and lived in a small house in a small village with each other but nothing ever happened in their lives which was as some would describe rather dull, so they don’t get mentioned much in this story at all.
Now one day when Susan was a baby sitting on a chair in her room talking to her dolls her nurse who was called Rose came in and tidied up as usual and went out.
About an hour or so later Shirley came in with a wand in one hand and a diamond flask of green sparkling liquid in the other which she gave to the princess to drink as medicine, which unfortunately it wasn’t. The vain, cruel, devious and deceitfully wicked witch had just given her gorgeous stepdaughter a frightful spell causing her to become dreadfully irritating and unbearably annoying.
So by the time Susan had become a teenager her distraught father and stepmother couldn’t stand it any more  so they sent her far away as possible from the castle to a small cabin a swampy wood with mosquitoes but Susan didn’t really like it there so she went to live in the city. Where she met a handsome and dashing young prince on a beautiful white steed who fell in love with her at first sight. The handsome and dashing young prince on a beautiful white steed whose name was called Gregory was fairly accommodating of the most irritating and annoying princess in all the land because she was also the most beautiful princess in all the land and nothing’s perfect.
After that Shirley and Graham sold the tallest castle on the top of the tallest peak of the tallest mountain in the farthest corner of the most distant land because it was too inconvenient and moved to a smaller castle in a lovely seaside town. Sally and George eventually had a child who they named Herbert and he grew up to be a street sweeper. And Susan and Gregory lived reasonably ever after, until they were both killed in a horse crash.